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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27403822">In The Light Of The Moon</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ExhaustedSunflower/pseuds/ExhaustedSunflower'>ExhaustedSunflower</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Six - Marlow/Moss</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, I hurt Cathy because I love her, Nightmares, Soft Ending, and sad, this one is soft</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-05</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 21:26:57</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,465</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27403822</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ExhaustedSunflower/pseuds/ExhaustedSunflower</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>She pulls herself back up off of the wall, looking at the moon one more time. The same moon from her first life. That moon saw all of the things she sees only in her dreams now. She wonders what the moon would say about humanity, if it could speak. Maybe it would be angry; maybe it would be tired. Or would it cry? Would it too be too afraid to speak?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Catherine of Aragon &amp; Catherine Parr, Catherine of Aragon &amp; Katherine Howard, Katherine Howard &amp; Catherine Parr</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>43</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>In The Light Of The Moon</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Cathy shoots out of bed, flinging herself to the window in a moment of adrenaline. She catches herself on the wall beside the window and looks desperately to the moon in an attempt to ground herself. That dream was bad, not just a normal nightmare. This one left her absolutely terrified, so much so that the panic allowed her to practically fly across the room.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>This isn’t new, just a bit inordinate. But sometimes she’ll wake up so scared that she falls into something. The first night she was able to sleep after reincarnation she knocked over the lamp on the bedside table. Usually though, she just sits up with her heart racing and her eyes squeezed shut in a vain attempt to protect herself from the horrors.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>But tonight she didn’t hurt anything, nor did she break any of her possessions. </span>
  <em>
    <span>That counts as a win,</span>
  </em>
  <span> she thinks to herself, feeling her heart rate slow to a reasonable pace. Still not a healthy pace, but one that she’s confident won’t send her to the hospital. She slumps against the windowsill as she feels the flight response slip away from her. The shaking hasn’t subsided, likely won’t for a few hours.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Reflecting on the dream isn’t something Cathy wants to do. No, she’d rather never think of it again. </span>
  <em>
    <span>But he looked so angry, and she was so scared she couldn’t speak-</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She pulls herself back up off of the wall, looking at the moon one more time. The same moon from her first life. That moon saw all of the things she sees only in her dreams now. She wonders what the moon would say about humanity, if it could speak. Maybe it would be angry; or maybe it would be tired. Or would it cry? Would it too be too afraid to speak? After all, Cathy hasn’t seen half of what it has and nearly all of her fight has left her.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Either way, it still comes back around to provide light. Will Cathy have to come back again and again, like the moon? How many cycles will she have to go through before it ends? Before she can stay in peace?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Perhaps that’s a selfish thought, she reasons. Because the moon has been doing this since the beginning of time, and it isn’t complaining. Cathy has only been at it for two lifetimes. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She looks away in shame, as if the moon might hear her thoughts. Attempting a shaking breath, she walks back over to her bed. But she doesn’t get back in it, she starts rifling through the blankets for her phone. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Slightly damp, I need a shower.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She finds her phone and checks the time. </span>
  <em>
    <span>1:23AM</span>
  </em>
  <span>, she’d only slept about twenty minutes. Her dream had felt like a lifetime though. </span>
  <em>
    <span>A lifetime of him grabbing my wrist and screaming- </span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Grabbing her towel on her way out of her room, she makes her way to the bathroom. She just puts the flashlight on her phone, not bothering with the light. It would be too harsh. It would make everything a little too real. There’s something that makes her feel protected by the dark. If the light is on it would make reality too loud, not that that makes any sense. She knows that her reasoning makes no sense, and yet here she is, setting up the shower with shaking hands in the low light of her phone. She puts her hair up into a bun so as not to wet it, and steps in.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The rhythmic feeling of the water against her back is so calming that she loses track of time. She hasn’t even picked up the soap yet, has just been standing there taking in the warmth. Maybe she misjudged how tired she really is, maybe she should have gotten back in bed and dealt with this in the morning. Because this is all so relaxing, and her adrenaline is wearing off, and she’s feeling a crash coming.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>A knock on the bathroom door nearly sends her to the grave one again. She catches herself on the handle they attached when she sprained her knee. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Useful, that handle was.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Cath? Are you okay?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Kitty, it’s just Kitty,</span>
  </em>
  <span> She reassures herself. She isn’t sure who she was expecting, but hearing Kitty’s voice through the locked door makes her visibly untense. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Y-Yeah, I’m good Kit.” She replies, kicking herself when she stutters. No way Kitty will believe that.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Can I come in?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The question causes Cathy to tense up again. Normally she has no issues with being naked in front of the queens. She knows they aren’t going to try anything, and she’s not the one with the sexual trauma. But right now she doesn’t want to be vulnerable, even in front of one of the people she trusts most in this house.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>After a moment of careful contemplation, </span>
  <em>
    <span>(Does she really want to admit that she doesn’t want to be seen right now? What would that imply?) </span>
  </em>
  <span>she decides to ask Kitty to give her a moment. Only a moment, nothing more. If only to give her time to unlock the door. If only to give her time.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Forgoing any actual washing, she gets out with one quick rinse of her body. Her hands make quick work of putting her towel on as she curses the fact that she forgot to bring any actual clothing with her. She takes another small moment to prepare herself to open the door. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Are you preparing to greet the cold air? Or preparing to greet your friend? </span>
  </em>
  <span>She imagines the moon is asking her these questions. It sounds calm, genuinely curious even though it knows the answer. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Perhaps all of the sleepless nights have gotten to her, she knows she isn’t as sharp as she is made to be in this life. But, to the moon’s questions- </span>
  <em>
    <span>Cathy does not know the answer.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Kitty looks only concerned when Cathy opens the door, holding tightly onto the edges of her tightly wrapped towel. She’s holding a bundle of clothing out to her.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You never remember to bring clothes with you. I brought sweats and a jumper.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Cathy thanks her, and selfishly asks for one more moment to change. Kitty grants her the moment.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When she finally emerges from the bathroom, freshly changed into clothes that are definitely Kitty’s, not Cathy’s own, Kitty immediately takes her hand. Cathy doesn’t pull away, she doesn’t flinch or squeak in fright or pale in fear. She would like to have reacted in any way that would make Kitty not touch her, but she doesn’t. She’s never been good at saying no.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She allows for Kitty to pull her through the hall, although they aren’t heading toward their rooms. No, they’re going straight to Catalina’s tonight. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It was a given, of course. Kitty must have also had a bad night. Cathy almost feels bad, since she’s started going to the others for help at night it’s only increased the amount of interrupted sleeps Catalina gets. Kitty can’t always help, and Cathy has half the mind to put her own worries aside to comfort the girl.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She won’t; because she is a coward and can hardly speak at all. But oh, would she absolutely love to. Usually she would, too. She’d also love to pull her hand out of Kitty’s grasp, because it is beginning to feel increasingly claustrophobic.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Kitty doesn’t knock, she just opens the door and heads for Catalina’s bed. This is unlike Cathy’s usual routine because Cathy usually waits for a quiet noise of acknowledgment from the other side before walking in. Her usual is also different because she doesn’t go for the bed right away. She goes for the window, checks that she can still see the moon, then slides into bed without much of a word at all.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Lina?” Kitty whispers, sitting on the edge of the bed. Catalina wakes up immediately, only slightly aware.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Hm?” She looks confused, clearly very tired. Cathy spares a thought of guilt as they wake her up. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It’s Kitty and Cathy, Lina.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>That gets her up. “Are you alright?” Is always the first thing she says.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Cathy nods, she always does. And then Kitty elbows her lightly and disagrees. The only difference with tonight is that Cathy flinches.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Kitty immediately attempts to apologize, which causes Catalina to fully sit up in concern. And in turn Cathy completely shrinks in on herself at the attention she’s receiving.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Catalina, ever so gently and slowly, reaches over and pulls Cathy’s hand out of Kitty’s grip and replaces it with her own. Cathy tries her best not to look relieved that she’s not being touched anymore. Although she thinks she failed, because she can see a slight look of curiosity cross Kitty’s face. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Nightmares?” Lina questions softly, receiving two timid nods.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She tuts softly at them, murmuring something involving </span>
  <em>
    <span>mis hijas</span>
  </em>
  <span> and </span>
  <em>
    <span>hermosas. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Of course Cathy blushes at the cooing, whereas Kitty just absolutely melts. Lina’s hands make their way up and down Kitty’s arms, almost in a petting motion, as she maneuvers her into a comfortable position tucked in tightly under the covers. It isn’t long before she’s dozing off to the tune of Spanish murmuring. Cathy nearly fell asleep watching the display.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When Lina’s attention turns to Cathy it’s unexpected. It shouldn’t be, she’s here in Lina’s bed after all. It’s just that Cathy had gotten so caught up in being the third party, she’d forgotten she came for comfort as well.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Does it count as her coming for comfort if Kitty all but pulled her here?</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Lina’s soft gaze melts right into Cathy in the dark. Just the eye contact feels warm, like a hug.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh, mija. You must be exhausted.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She can only nod, because she is so exhausted that she isn’t fully able to form words.  Lina then stands, much to the confusion of Cathy. When Cathy doesn’t stand with her, Lina looks at her kindly to explain.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Up you get. You haven’t seen </span>
  <em>
    <span>la luna </span>
  </em>
  <span>yet.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It had never occurred to her that Lina might have picked up on her habit of looking at the moon. She never says anything as Cathy stares out the window. Cathy had always assumed that she’s too asleep to notice the movement until Cathy got to the bed.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She stands on shaky legs to sluggishly move to the window. Lina doesn’t touch her, just follows her with one hand ready to catch her if she falls. She isn’t sure how much longer she can stay up for. It’ll be really bad if she starts falling asleep mid walk. Cathy won’t be able to explain that away, and Lina will have seen it so she’d freak out. Cathy might actually need to seek medical help if that happens. She’s unsure what the medical support would do, but it’s always been a scary but steady option.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They make it to the window, and she doesn’t sit like she usually would on the window seat. She wishes she had one of these in her room. Although to be fair, if she had one of these in her room she wouldn’t use her bed. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The moon is still there, still watching. It’s a comfort to know, in the midst of the night terrors and chaotic waking, that there is always that peaceful looking constant. She wonders if the moon knows, if that’s the reason it keeps itself looking so regal and calm. The moon is, and always will be, a comfort to humanity.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They don’t stay by the window very long before Cathy is crying softly. Catalina immediately moves into action. Not touching, but speaking. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>“Estará bien. Lo sé. Lo sé. </span>
  </em>
  <span>Oh, querida, it's okay. We are here.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She continues her reassurances until Cathy can properly breathe again, and her crying has slowed to a minimal amount. Cathy tears her gaze from the window and moves it to Kitty, who is still sound asleep in Lina’s bed.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>She’d been so tired. Has been tired since they wed, why can’t he see that she’s tired? Why won’t he let her go?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>In a small bit of bravery, Cathy grabs Lina’s hand. This goes against everything her body is telling her to do. Her mind is telling her to run far, far away from any human contact. Her body is telling her she’s going to get hurt. Her heart says that she’s being stupid. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>But Lina just gently caresses her thumb across the top of Cathy’s hand and leads her back to the bed. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Lina gets in first, Cathy suspects this is so she can be in between Kitty and her, and then she urges Cathy under the covers as well. She doesn’t pull her in, but on the other side Kitty immediately snuggles into the woman.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It’s all so </span>
  <em>
    <span>gentle, loving.</span>
  </em>
  <span> A stark contrast to Cathy’s dream. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Her wrist was in so much pain and he didn’t care. He may have broken it. She’s not going to be able to write like this.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Mi hija, what’s going on?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Cathy flinches once again when she is broken out of her flashback. The steady breathing of her godmother truly is relaxing to listen to in it’s own right, so she focuses on that to calm herself down.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m sorry.” She apologizes, because this is ridiculous. She should have a handle on this by now. It’s been a month since she’s let Catalina and the other queens help her and nothing productive has happened. On top of that, she can’t even stay in the present. She keeps thinking about the past, about </span>
  <em>
    <span>him.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>And in that moment, she thought, ‘Oh lord, I’m going to have his baby. This monster is the father of my daughter.’ She could not leave him.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Don’t be, mija. It’s quite alright.”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She pulls her hand out of Lina’s grasp and instead grabs at the women's nightgown. Nevermind the fact that she feels like a child as she does it, she needs this right now. Lina gets the hint, because of </span>
  <em>
    <span>course </span>
  </em>
  <span>she does, and pulls Cathy in. Cathy tries to explain, she does, but all that comes out is a mess of </span>
  <em>
    <span>my baby</span>
  </em>
  <span> and </span>
  <em>
    <span>he hurt me.</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She feels an explanation is more than needed, but apparently Lina doesn’t, because the woman just shushes her and rubs her back soothingly.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>And, under the slight light of the moon, in the embrace of a trusted family member, Catherine Parr finally falls asleep. When Catalina wakes up in the morning, she’ll be warm and held together by two content sleeping figures. Her daughters, so she calls them. They needed her, still need her. And so then she will go right back to sleep, allowing the two girls to catch up on some much needed rest.</span>
</p>
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